I have had a massive push in my personal life already this year. It is literally forcing me to accept and be open to the strange workings of the universe. Without going into painful details, I will say that I am at a crossroad. I have the option to resist and be engulfed in sadness and resentment or choose to accept my fate and evolve with this experience. The only power that I have in this situation is choice. I can not control the natural order or prevent an unwanted outcome, I can only experience and make a conscious choice to sink or swim.

I feel on a universal level that 2017 is going to offer some of these experiences for many people. Perhaps you have already been hit with adversity in some way. We have certainly entered into a new world on an energetic level and there are some great shifts occurring both on an environmental and a humanitarian front. I feel we are being tested in every way possible and we must remember that we have power of choice.

So, how do we exercise our power of choice and move forward with dignity and empowerment? I have tried a few things and read a few things that I would like to share here for your use. Please remember that you are very much needed in this time, your connecting life force is very beneficial to all.

Exercising the power of choice:

Breathe. In the darkest times, this can be the most difficult. You may feel that the decision has already been made and you are nothing but a player in a catastrophic game. It is here that I encourage you to breathe deeper for just a little longer and let the grief wash over you. By attaching to the feelings, we often become them and this in turn creates a dark cycle.

Question yourself. I am not talking about condemning your feelings and putting yourself down, I am asking you to see what you are gaining from your current situation. If you are very ill, what do you get from this? Does someone take care of you? Perhaps, it allows you to withdraw from difficulties in your job or relationships. You are exercising choice in every moment, even if you feel your problem is owning you. Once you realise that you are receiving nothing positive from your current state, you will feel power to change.

Dream and manifest. There is nothing wrong with thinking about an ideal situation in which you are the main benefactor. By releasing your thoughts from the current crisis and allowing yourself to manifest a different life, you are calling your subconscious into action. Use your power of good intention and bring happiness back to your life with speed and efficiency.

Rest and be reborn. Every period of hardship offers us a chance to learn and grow from the experience. As seemingly hopeless as you may feel, I implore you to look deeper into the lesson the situation has to teach you, rather than the event itself. Do you need to let go of some things that are no longer serving you? Is it time that you started doing things for yourself?

I know these can feel like rather frivolous answers to very serious situations in your life, but they do work. If you aren’t ready to answer the big questions, you may like to try the following, more practical and immediate applications to your hurt; It’s all good healing.

Short-term healing choices:

Take a trip. It might not be practical to escape straight away but I found that planning a little getaway has done wonders for my healing. It puts into motion the idea of moving forward, of life going on and you being an active part of the natural passing of time. A simple weekend road trip could do you wonders.

Buy a book. If you can’t leave the house, find one online. Go for something that highlights a survivor or alternatively, a book on a topic completely new to you. I recently bought Women who run with Wolves, by Clarissa Pinkola Estes. I have enough experience with manifestation to know that this book is a BIG sign.

Watch old movies. I say this as someone who is not an active viewer of such films. In fact, I was browsing the catalogue of Netflix when I came across biopic Taylor and Burton. As a gen Y who has limited knowledge of Elizabeth Taylor’s peak stardom, I found this movie a tantalising teaser into her tumultuous relationship with Richard Burton. I consequently binged on Who’s afraid of Virginia Wolf and Cleopatra in the following days. As both actors have since died, it was strangely refreshing to become immersed in a world so foreign to my own.

Write a story. Perhaps this is simply because I am a writer but in my two weeks of laying in bed, the most bizarre trigger for a story came from the two bars of a familiar song playing over the outro to a soap I was watching. Suddenly I was in high-school, experiencing unparalleled emotions linked to first love, friendships and 90s fashion. I fantasised for a while before picking up a pen and scrawling a few pages. After that, the painkillers kicked back in and I fell asleep; the physical act of writing created a peaceful release.

Everyone experiences difficult periods in their life in different ways. Most importantly, we do need to experience what is happening in order to free ourselves to move on. Whatever you do to feel your pain is okay, provided you do not harm yourself or others. The danger is that we repress our hardships only for them to resurface when we least expect.

Above all, be kind to yourself and exercise your power of choice. You will then move steadily through icy waters and wash up with grace onto your island in the sun.

Listen to Self-Love Podcast to hear more.

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